I Sait It "Out Loud"

Sunrise over the lake.

Hello to anyone out there who might be reading. I realized that since this post I have neglected to write about my plans to get healthy/ lose weight. In the new habit of being completely honest with myself, and choosing to share these things with the internet, here it goes...I haven't written about it because there is nothing to update. No improvements made. At best I've been treading water, so to speak, and I've wanted to shove my goal of losing weight into the closet with all of the other clothes that no longer fit and shelve my goals. Along with my self esteem.

But I'm not going to do that.

June, as short as it has been thus far, has been a very productive and awakening month for me. I think I've finally thawed out from the move over the winter. (yeah, it took long enough right?) After a blur of January, February, and March, April held some painful realizations for me. May was spent mourning over those realizations and pouting a bit. And now June has come along. I am over feeling sorry for myself. I am over the sense of defeat and ready to move on. Ready to take charge. Ready to make some real change.

Real change starts with a change of mindset. Or at least, a change of heart. A change of point of view. I've had all three. I've been empowered and I am ready to share with the world. I am ready to hold myself accountable, and to reach out to others to help hold myself accountable. I am done making excuses...excuses not to exercise, not getting the work done that I want to get done, and for falling short of the person I want to be.

As far as my weight goes, which ties directly to this "good health" I am searching for...I have let my thyroid disease be my excuse for being overweight for far too long. I have let the screws in my hips be an excuse not to push my body into exercising, and sometimes into not moving at all. I've let the nerves that get pinched in my pelvis hold me back. When the truth is: Moving is good for me. It is the best medicine around. I won't ever be a marathon runner. In fact, I won't ever be a runner at all (the impact from running is actually bad for my hips, doctor says) but I can be a walker, a swimmer, a biker, and a million other active things. I've shed the fear and I am ready to shed the pounds, too.

And about this "diet" thing, which is really a lifestyle change for me, because it will be permanent, I have found the guidance I have been searching for. I've tried low carb. I've tried other "fad" diets and failed...because that is just it, they're fads. I could never stick to them. I know what is best for me and that is to count calories and eat a balanced diet of a little bit of everything. Cut out the really bad stuff (bye bye, cheetos) but overall, don't deny myself of foods like bread and fruit, just because some diet guy who wrote a book says they're bad for me. I know that method doesn't work. Not for me. My goal is to overall, just eat healthy...and count calories until I shed the weight I want to shed.

The website SparkPeople.com is going to help me achieve my goals.

At the risk of sounding like an infomercial: If you are interested in losing weight or just improving your lifestyle, I highly encourage you to click the link above and check it out. I was skeptical at first, esp. since I found it just stumbling around on the internet, but this site is wonderful. They have a calorie counter that actually has a database of foods to refer to, a meal plan generator, exercise tracker, message boards, teams you can join, motivation articles, etc. There are SO many tools! I haven't even reached the full potential of the site yet. And best of all, it's FREE!

I got on Spark People, signed up, and created a profile. And most importantly, I said it "out loud": I want to lose 40 pounds by November 2011.

That's two pounds a week. That is back to what I weighed in high school. That will put me back into my healthy BMI range. I want to feel my age and not my weight.

So, there you have it. I know I can do this thing. And I know that as I shed the pounds I will gain what I lost in energy. That thought is so very exciting. I know there will be bumps in the road, and even setbacks, but I am ready to take my health into my own hands and face this thing head-on. Positive changes have already taken place. I look forward to those that are still to come.

Please feel free to comment and post any helpful websites or tips of your own for eating healthy and/or losing weight. And if anyone out there ever needs some support, just holler at me! Seriously : )